...what I've become...

it's 29/12/2010...who knew, a year just passed by...
this year started with lots of hope and excitement and good thing happening to me..I feel blessed..
with me continuing my degree and having all the approval from my family members...with Mr darcy by my side cheering me on when I'm down..with me trying to make the best of everything i can...
oh well, I'm not capable of handling where it might lead me..I'm only capable of marking the starting point...
getting new acquaintance, but slowly...I isolate myself from others for the 1st half year...i guess, things work out pretty good...
the next half year, i try to be more socialized with people around me...try to be nice with everyone and try to avoid any hatred-caused feeling or situation..but in the end, I manage to get myself into most of it..Bravo me!..hahhaa..oh well, I know I'm such a emphatic and altruistic person, and most of the time I'm being unfair to myself...when I caused some "problem" that makes some of my acquaintance feels mad at me, I didnt realize what I did...the thing is, when I did something, it was out of sincerity and sometimes I tease people just for fun...but who knows, in the end it backfired and caused this scene that I wish I never encounter...and the only solution that I could do for that moment is just to ignore everything and everyone...I know its bad...I know I should atleast apologize...my i guess, my pride was thinking that I didn't do anything wrong that I intend to, so it's not something I should be apologize for... Pride huh?!
i guess I've made a bad impression on myself..and i hate the girl I've became...I'm being too selfish this year...
maybe some of my friends said that I was not being selfish enough, but just bearing this feeling of guilt makes me feel rueful...

so, I want to apologize to all my friends for everything that I've done...some which I know I didnt realize..especially to my roommate, Miss S**** A**...To my classmates (eventho I didnt know whether you guys will be reading this or not), Mr L**** A****, Mr H**** F***, Mr H****, Mr Dindang (shoot! I forgot his real name..gomene~), Mr N*****, Mr H******, Mr S****, Miss A***** A***** and others that I might not mention here...

will be continued..

xoxo