...this heart of mine...

Ramadhan is ending soon...

It's sad...I don't want it to end...

A month of blessings and full of love from God to us...

Syawal?

Not that I'm not happy for it...

It's just, have to face the first day of raya at my grams house...with the uncles and aunts from my father's side there...and the raya prayer...and the crying that would definitely come after that...reminiscing about daddy...

It's just to heartbreaking for me...

Still trying and pretend to be strong every time I talked about daddy, but when all of them are crying on the first day of raya thinking how we missed him so much...It's too painful and I'm not eager for that moment...at all...

I don't want to cry...coz I know, that would pain him in his peace knowing people are still grieving for him...

And I know that he is in a better place...Insya-Allah...Allah loves him better than we do...

Daddy, your little princess misses you a lot...I just wish I could hug you for one more time...coz I still remember the moment where I hugged & kissed your cold body for the last time...I miss you daddy...

"Ya Allah, please forgive all his sins and all my sins that makes him suffer..."

-naraj©2012-

xoxo ♥

....Chasing down the yesteryears...

Yes...I am...

Gonna go and track down...

Every single bit of it...

The Story...

Of how...

this person I am...

able to wander...

on this earth...

and a Proud Sarawakian today...

Gonna go...

to all the sources....

from the great...

great...

great...

great grandfather...Lim Teck Sim

to the great....

great...

great grandfather Pangeran X...

a name not to be disclosed yet....

Gonna find those...

pieces of puzzles...

tracking down...

stalking the past...

and make it my newest project to come!

Yeay!

-naraj©2012-

xoxo ♥

...in the rough...

after all of the years,

living in this ship,

I've never thought that it would sink,

and making a mess out of me...

now this shipwreck is blocking my path,

making what's beyond me become dark,

and I know I need to move on,

before I run out of air...

I'll tear those shattered pieces,

even if I know that my hands would bleed,

but I will keep going on even if it'll dry me out,

coz in the end it will heal and I'll be moving on...

-naraj©2012-

xoxo ♥

Eyes Open

Why??

I keep wondering why...

why now? why them?

Been listening a lot to Taylor Swift's Eyes Open lately and learning the guitar chords for it..hence the title...

Also, as a reminder to myself to always keep my eyes open...and be alert!~ o.0 (for what, i dont even know)

Ya see...my first ex...he's a nice guy...it's just, i guess for the first one, I'm expecting the kind of guy who would worshiped me and be all over me when we were in a relationship...though I admit, I dont really feel that exited about him, I'm just in love with the idea of being in love for the first time...which I know by now it's not really love... x_x
after 7years of dumping him over the phone, ( as we are far apart and I haven't receive any news from him more than a week )...suddenly my cousin called me and ask, do know this guy that claimed to know me and used to be very close to me like his own family?? ( mind you, we rarely speak or msg each other back then..and we're in a r/ship not more than 3weeks i guess )

she told me his name, and its quite a unique name, so of course I know straight away, though the facts is not that true..haha..

so, my cousin was so excited and try to get us together again, but thankfully, he's in relationship now... *phew* ...and she stops talking about him...

and I thought, wow, it really is a small world and it's kinda nice to know that he still remembers something that I forget already...up until his name showed up again.. *ngeehehee*

then, my other cousin ( a boy this time )...he's working as some state officials that requires him to go to remote places and what not...even though its tiring, but its kinda nice, having to travel around to places you wouldn't even know exist..

so, one day he came to our grams house ( i was there that day ) with a new car...my dream car at that, so i asked him, who's car is that? and he said, it was his friend...the one who's working with him now...and he asked me if I know him..as we are from the same Uni maybe different year...and he told me the name...the son-of-a-bitch-that-I'd-rather-forget name...dang! of all people...now I feel like I'm cursed~hahhaa... that guy used to be my scandal until I broke it off with him, coz being with him, ya at first i feel like in a fairytale kind of relationship, until I found out that he has a gf back home, and all the scandals that he used to have before me, which is a lot!...turns out that he have the reputation of a player among the guys coz he's very slick among girls...sound so goodytwoshoes that you can't believe of what he capable of...enough said, I tried..i said TRIED getting rid of him so hard...can't believe he turns out to be a stalker as I was the first girl ever dumping him...*hell yeah~ I'm proud of me!! XD*...he stalks me and even tried to sweet talk me into getting together with him again...oh-my-goodness...such a nightmare..

soooo...worried of my freedom from the stalker, i told my cousin not to ever mention my name or having knowing me in front of him in any case...being the annoying cousin he is, he threatened me into telling him if i didnt tell him "our" story...so i just told him that he used to be my stalker that could really be my worst-nightmare-coming-true, and thankfully he's happy with that explanation...

The world is indeed very small...and I just wish to never ever even bumped into that stalker ever...EVER! 

xoxo,

naraj©2012

downloading-maniac-on-the-move

Happy New Year everyone!
Ya, I know, it's march already and I'm still saying happy new year to you.. =.=''
the thing is, I've been so occupied with all my school work before and due to nada internet connection, I'm not able to update anything...and usually my ideas would come when I'm in no possible condition to online...
geezz...i think my grammar's getting terrible...due to less rambling in writing and when I do ramble while talking with friends, I don't even know what me myself are saying...hahhaa.. m_m

so, finally, I'm a graduate student!!! yeay! Done with my bachelor degree in multimedia computing...just got back to my hometown almost 1 month now...
as usual, will be the Rapunzella (which is Cinderella + Rapunzel, Cinderella for doing all the house chores, and Rapunzel for being "trapped" in these huge house of mine in the middle of the forest..coz I have no license or any transport to go anywhere)

see, I told you, my house is in the middle of forest...the one with the yellow arrow...hahaha...

anyway, back then books is the only salvation for me..coz tv can be too boring...and now that I've got the wifi connection for my house, I've became a download maniac~ Noooooo!!!!!!!!   )o.0( 

not that I intend to...was thinking of doing some freelancing while looking for jobs...but then, seems that my siblings are all addicted to Korean Variety shows nowadays, esp Running Man, so I'm the only 'man' that are capable of looking for all the downloading links for the latest  episodes..thus, that what I've been doing since I have this internet connection...A bliss!!! muahahahhaaa!!! <---evil laugh =.=''
not just running man, I've been busy downloading English series ,Korean drama series, Japanese drama series and also Taiwan drama series...woot!! not to forget, Movies!!!!!...hahaha... thats why i dont mind being a Rapunzel..hehehee~


well, most of the days I do spent it at my grams house, but then I have to wake up at 5am to be able to follow my mom and sister and ask them to send me to grams house b4 they went for work...very early indeed..coz they need to send my lil sister to her school which always jammed by 7am..so, to escape all the traffic, they prefer to go as early as possible.

ok, back to the downloading part...as all the downloaders know, movies and drama series can took a lot of space..so now, everything is RED in my laptop and ext harddisk..my 1.5TB...guess i need more now, as I'm addicted to downloading old drama series like Charmed!! ooohhh~ i miss those old days~

oh well, enough rambling for now..gotta go...need to prepare for dinner~ ciao~

-naraj2012-