~~ShaDowS QuoTe oF tHe DaY~~

LaW mAkeR sHoUlD nOt bE lAw BrEaKeR

Life fails to be perfect but never fails to be beautiful~
-anon-



....when everything falls apart....

Friday, December 25, 2009

Merry Merry Merry Christmas Minna-san

such a terrible title for a post right???
lol
oh well...
On this jolly morning, i wake up a lil late than usual..
Been watching Snow Queen till the last episodes last night!! XD

Waking up with so much Christmas show in tv
Now watching Spongebob Christmas show....


Geez...
5 more days to go~~~
I haven't pack anything yet...
Suddenly got this unsettling emotions lingering around me...
Dear Santa, please make it go away...LOL

XOXO <3


.....and all of our yesterdays have lighted fools....

Thursday, December 24, 2009

feels like my brain is screaming for me to find something to read that acquire me to think deeply...
It's been a while since I read or get my hands on any English literature or poems...
which I love to do when I was young coz my daddy always feed me with those stuffs..
Now, I hardly had any company to share those kind of things...
I can't talk about poems or literature to any of my siblings...
My sister hardly cares..
My younger bros doesn't know what it is except for the one they learned at school...
and I think the last poems that I read and fall in love is



I fell in love with that character when I read about King Arthur myhtology
The usual character that we heard is, Arthur, Guinevere, Lancelot, Merlin, Mordred and Lady Of The Lake..
But no one ever heard of Elaine of Astolat ...
Elaine of Astolat or Lady of Shallot or Fair Maiden of Astolat

Her life story is not much to be told..
Some of books did mention a little about her..
The most thing that I love about her is..
No one ever really saw her face
(coz she rarely leave her tower and she watch the world through her magic mirror)
and her devotion for Lancelot was to die for..
(not that I mean killing yourself for an unrequited love is good...mind you)
It's just sad, to know that how much she loves Lancelot
but Lancelot never knew about her or who she was
She keep loving him and watching over him
And he never known her existence...not until the day she died
Where she float herself to death through the river towards Camelot with Lancelot in her mind...

I always think that, what if Lancelot get to know her?
Would they became lover?
Would Lancelot love her more than he loves Guinevere?
Would Camelot fall?
Would Arthur be abandoned by Guinevere?

The questions still remains in me...
and that's the good thing about history I guess...
we will try not to make the same mistake they used to make...
I guess, it's ok trying to be blunt to the one you love..
and knowing how they feel about you
rather than you keep thinking and regretting your whole life ahead...
Your pride might be wounded for a while...
but it worth it than to have your whole life trying to turn back time to know the truth..
and keep regretting the time you waste for not telling them (n_n)
Well, that's just my opinion...

thank you for reading..
hope you like the poems too XD



XOXO

....opening up a new package of christmas present...

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

nah~~ not talking about christmas actually..
but anyway
Merry Christmas to all of those that celebrate it!

Due to lack of anything to do and no one to talk to or to ym to...
I've been filling in posts in both of my blogs...
not that no one is on my ym, it's just that I'm afraid that they are doing works and I dont want to bother them...

so i've been blogwalking the blog that I've been following...
two of my favorite are:

whenever I read those blog..I feel like I was surrounded by a positive energy...
It's full of love and optimism..
No matter what you feel, positive vibe will reach you through their words...
and you can really relate as they are viewing from the daily routine of our life...
It's the same routine, the same habit, just being viewed from a different and positive perspectives...
It can be said that they are giving us the positive psychology without we realize it...

From what I've searched throughout the net, [wikipedia]
Positive psychology is a  branch of psychology that "studies the strengths and virtues that enable individuals and communities to thrive". Positive psychologists seek "to find and nurture genius and talent", and "to make normal life more fulfilling" not simply to treat mental illness.

So in other word, it's a psychology that help human to live more happily and fulfilling...
If being observe, most people doesn't know a true life virtue anymore...
Kindness are being exploits
Appreciations are being misunderstood
Curiosity are being misplaced
Leadership are being overused
Hope are being label as foolishness
Humor is being label as stupidity
Love is being played around
Gratitude is often being ignored
It's been forgotten especially for the younger generations...
It's sad to watch them degrade themselves that way...
All they care about is being cool...
Which are so not cool esp when they are being arrogant and stupid...
They can't blame anyone but themselves...but all they do is blaming others for their misfortunes in life...

I'm hoping that this positive psychology will reach them and make them want to be a better person...

XOXO

...1 more days to go...

tomorrow will be my last day working here in the library~~
*phewwww~~*
relieved~
finally will get my holidays which are not much of a holiday as I will be busy preparing stuff to bring along with me to Shah Alam..
and I realized that my flight is on New Year Eve..no wonder people keep smiling when I told them I'm going by 31st December...
just realized it's new year the next day..and I will be celebrating it in KL...
which didn't really excite me much...
unless there is some good stuff going on~ :D

Not much work for me today...
I can say, no work at all...
As I was suppose to scan all the past year paper, but the machine broke and I have to wait for it to be fix..
and I'm quite disappointed with the internet connection today coz it's sooo slowww~~
my brown sugar macchiato took a long time to finish~
Usually in a day I could finish download 3 episodes..
but today, I'm still downloading 1 episode..which is excruciating...

Oh no..i sound so depressing day by day..LOL

Well, I'll try to be more optimistic in the future I hope...
maybe because I named my blog on shadows, all my post sounds a lil bit gloom..hahhaa
sorry guys...
and thank you for keeping up with me though
the turbulence of my emotion are sometimes too hideous..
even for me.. ROTFL
XD

XOXO

...walking in their shoes...

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

this morning..as i opened my lappy and trying to figure out the broken links in my work
suddenly a ym chat window pop-up
and it was from one of my lecturers
Mr. A.S
asking what degree course did I get
and what I'm doing now...
So i told him, I;m still working in this library till 24th..
and he ask if it's ok for me to go out to have breakfast before lunch hour..
and as usual, of course I said ok... Even Miss A.E always kidnapped us from work...
LOL
so, we went out for brunch I might say..
and we talk about students that he used to teach and about what should we be expecting in Shah Alam...
he also give a very good info for me
which is for our students who didn't get any dorm, he advised that we rent from the flats behind the campus back gate..which are more cheaper...
and the good news is he said that, mostly female students will get dorm for the 1st semester...
but for male students, hardly had any chances..

So, while we ate, we talk...and he was talking about two of his students that's going to be in my class too next year...he said that their character are good and very independent..
and that type of people is very good to work with..even though they are quite slow to pick up the pace..
but once they get it, it will be a smooth ride~
Most of lecturers in other course are quite free I might say..but not in my course..
they are very busy..
Even while waiting for out order to come
Mr A.S was talking while leafing through all of his mail and stuffs..
and he said that he's still busy even until the new student came in...
and he said that maybe for the next sem, our part 1 junior is much more fewer than before...
so, as we talk about what did he do during the induction training..
he said that lots of people doesn't believe when he said that he's married..
*why, of course no one believe sir, you look young n so charismatic..Bet lots of girls are heartbroken when you rejected them*
LOL

oh well...the thing is..as I listen to him..i realized that what we seen is not exactly what happen...
*only for those dedicated lecturers i mean*
I mean, when we see our lecturer coming to class and start teaching..
we never thought for a moment, what did they prepared before teaching us...
did they just come and teach and being good at it?
did they just naturally being good at teaching?
are they in a good mood for teaching us?
why are they teach us differently?
all those stuffs...
and today I realized that, a dedicated lecturer will spend their time to get to know their students
and they will try to see the potential and character in them...
and as Mr.A.S said, he teach his student according to their characters...
and for the classes that have the same characters, it is easier for them to handle..
but like my batch..as he said..there are lots of different characters that we portray...
I try to see and feel in his point of view...
and I must say, it is difficult to handle our batch as I will be confuse on how to approach my students with that many characters...
but as he said, it is interesting to watch and learn from them...

and I know lately, my lecturers is knowing more of me than they had before..
in a much leisure way... (n_n)
and Mr A.S is very curious on why I'm still single...LOL
he thought that I was playing hard to get..
LOL...I wish~ XD


well, I never ask him, what kind of character did I portray...
Hoping it was a good one...*grin*

All I know is, I'm blessed to have those kind of lecturers who are really dedicated and care about their students...not like other faculties...
I'm very much grateful to them for me to be where I am right now


XOXO ♥

....flutter in my heart....

looking at your name
popping up from my email alert
makes my heart twist and flutter
It's a bittersweet pain that I longed to feel

Thank you....
For giving me those feelings up until today
Thank you...
for making my day feels beautiful with your words
Thank you...
and I missed you

XOXO  ♥



....Under The Surface of Tranquility....

Monday, December 21, 2009


They say, if it doesn't kill you will make you stronger
-Pixie Lott Nothing Compare-

as the Princess walks and stumble in the forest..
while trying to find the lights to illuminate her way
she found an apple tree that is ripe with its fruits
She was ecstatic thinking about the food she's going to devour

She walk faster towards the tree
and there she found an ugly truth
If she was to climb the tree to get the fruits
she have to bear with the thorns that surrounds the tree

trying to be brave
she try to get through the thorns
She bear with it
She was bruised, she hurt and she scratch herself
Soon, the thorns become part of her routine
Try to go past it, getting bruised and battered
She keep holding on coz by going thru all of it
She can get her food to survive

Patiently she wait
finally, she saw the light
and she knows
She doesn't have to put up with the thorns anymore
She'll be able to walk away
With her, the scars still remains
But she will be able to find her way out
Soon

naraj09©

XOXO 



....Alhamdulillah...

Thursday, December 17, 2009


I'm stoked when i get this~
Just sooo happy!!
But then, I'm quite worried with my family reactions...
Will they let me go?
Will they let me continue?
so many questions and anxiety~~~*sigh*

then I called my okasan..
and she says, OK!
*big grin*
but the sad thing is
my oneechan says no...
I'm afraid that she will try to stop my mum from letting me go~~
*sigh sigh sigh*
plus my grandma also says that it's hard to let me go that far~
*sigh heavily*

I dont know what else to do~~

XOXO ♥


♬♫ Gossip Girl Season 3 Download Links ♫♬

now I'm gonna share an almost complete of Gossip Girl Season 3...*big grin*


to make it easier to download I try to find a mediafire links
so enjoy~ (n_n)




Episode 10 part1 part2

Episode 11 part1 part2


all the split file can be join by using this software

XOXO ♥

...creeps in this petty pace from day to day...

yesterday been a really stressful but yet enjoying day for me

I forgot my hp at home..and I suppose to have lunch at my best friend house but she can't contact me and I can't contact her...which end up we didn't met each other...
Coz I was going out with my lecturer, Mizz Adelle and farey for bfast...
which sucks..coz I feel really guilty coz I can't contact her...

But then, things gets better I guess...
I've been trying to download 'Brown Sugar Macchiato' Drama
But, my IDM is very slow~~
so I tried using my FDM and, voila! I managed to download 2 episodes!
yippe!!!

More info about:

I get the full episodes download links from a site that are recommended by Taqi-kun:
which is cool, coz it has Japanese,Korean,Taiwan and also Chinese download links...the same with Timelessub 
my favourite sites!

Unfortunately, it's in megaupload...but, what the heck, as long as I can get it..LOL

and one more sad thing is, Gossip Girl Season 3 Ep13 is not out yet..supposed to be out next year~~~ *sigh*

Oh well...
Then, the disappointment came...
I can't check my degree application result yet!!!
Damn that stupid system!!

XOXO ♥

...Gazing into the abyss of my happiness...

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Bliss is a habit you can cultivate, in other words, not an accident that you stumble upon by chance, in a lucky hour, at the world's end somewhere.
-anonymous-

maybe I'm in pms cycle right now...Damn!!!
Feel soooo down...
too much happen...
unnecessary stuffs...
bad things keep occurring one by one...
made me feel even more worse...
*sigh sigh sigh*

when will this be over???
I want for it to be over!
I want my life back!
I want my happiness back!
I want my family back~~~

XOXO ♥

...I'm running away...

there is a pleasure in the pathless woods;
there is a rapture on the lonely shores;
There is society, where none intrudes,
by the deep sea, and music in its roar;
I love not man the less,but Nature more...
-Lord  Byron-


   Pleasure By The Nature
Nature brings a colourful beauty to one’s heart,
It flies in our hearts like colourful butterfly,
It strengthens the hearts with huge wings to fly,
A beautiful creature lives in the heart of nature.

A life is not enough to enjoy the whole nature,
Each and every part of the Universe comes under nature,
The nature is part of existence of human life,
Without the nature, there will be no future.

The nature survives the lives with pleasure,
The beautiful nature is a creator of great desire,
The fine nature lives with us and lives in us,
It brings many dreams and memories to us.

Oh God! We are thankful for gifting us a pleasant nature,
It is one’s responsibility to save the beauty of nature,
A true living in the heart of nature helps an achiever,
To achieve the long life period of his splendid desire.

-Dr. M.Swaroopa Rani M.A., PhD-
 
 
Happiness lies in nature
  The true happiness
lies in the lap
of nature,
Where everyone feels
very delighted because of nature.
The morning dances
and have a happy
look at the mother nature.
The air blows,
but visits the mother nature,
for a while when it passes by.
The flowers wake up
with a wonderful morning,
when the mother nature
has shown this morning
to a wonderful happiness.
The birds making a
good play chirping
and moving around
the nature which is
a big gift given
by Almighty God.

-Pushkar Bisht -  
 


XOXO ♥

...running towards the ceasefire or escapade...

Monday, December 14, 2009

not in a very good condition of emotion today~

trying hard to make her understand the condition that she makes us go thru these few weeks...
maybe we should just be patient...
but then, it keeps getting worse...
what's wrong? I dont know...
 Everything just seems wrong to her...

All we want is to make you happy...
All we want is everything to be ok...
All we want is laughter in this house again...like before...
All we want is for us to be happy just the way it was...
All we want is to respect you...
All we want is to love you...
All we want is to help you ease your burden...

But...
We also need you...
to help us to understand...
to respect us..
respect what we do and what we want...
understand us for the things that we've done...
understand us and appreciate us for the simple things that we'd done...

Coz no matter what...
We will always love you...


XOXO ♥

...out,out brief candles...

Saturday, December 12, 2009



involve in a relationship for the first time..all i think about love & relationship is happiness all year round...no sadness involved unless when it came to separation between the two souls...never did i know that the reality is not like what in fairy tales that i used to read.

Starting out innocently, i pour my heart and give all the love i had to give to that one person..thinking that he's doing the same...believing that he'd do the same...i keep my faith in him, eventhough everyday I feel like my heart is breaking...I keep giving out my love no matter what he'd do...and i believed that we'd make it through...

yet, i was surrounded by people who are more senior in this relationship department...and my mistakes is to look towards them and how they handle their relationship and love...iinstead of loving in my own way, slowly, without realizing, I'm becoming more like them and trying to turn my relationship like them...
as my heart keeps breaking, at that time, i guess it's a right move..

.I thought that i shouldn't give too much love and start asking back for it...I start to stop giving out too much of my heart, and i thought I feel much better...little did i know that my heart was turning into ice...I started being harsh, I started being angry...I thought that i should stop being weak in this relationship and show him that I can do on my own better...thought that he would change...but it seems like our ship is sinking far than we realize...and turns out that he'd found a boat without taking me with him...



I was left alone..sinking..and going deep down under...staring at the emptiness...
then I decided, I don't need a boat to save my life..heck, i can swim myself out....
so i started swimming up for air..for the sunshine that i longed for....when i finally reach the shores, he's still struggling with his paddling...and along the way, i guess, he'd found another ship to take him in...and I'm finally having my feet on the ground, started to realize that, I shouldn't have stop giving out my love...it does matter if i didn't get it back, coz i got plenty to give...and by doing just that, my heart feels warm and alive..rather than cold and bitter in an empty ship~





naraj09©


XOXO  ♥

....in the midst of everything...

Friday, December 11, 2009

everything that swirling around me
hearing the voices inside my head
I'm in a path where I can see everything
But I just dont know where to start or to turn to

I used to think I can do anything
Naively, I thought that I could get it all
Logically, I could
But it seems that everything and everyone is against me

Now, all I could is just swimming with the flow
I get tired trying to go against it
Sometimes it feels worthless
But most of the time it feels good...and I love it!

Somehow, I feel like giving up
I feel like I should be content being this way
But I still feel like there's more for me
Like I could get anything that I want

But today of most day
I feel like it's just a dreams
Not a reality I should be living in
And I'm back to where I started...being clueless~~~



naraj09©

XOXO  ♥

...movies download link...

Thursday, December 10, 2009

as i was looking for my fav movie, Serendipity
I stumble upon this page that gives lots of mediafire link for download

when i say lots..i mean LOTS!!!!
try to look for yourselves

From Hindi, Malay, Chinese, English, Japanese, and Korean movie~
you can find almost everything here...
even the kind of movie you never heard of...

enjoy~ :D

p/s: my hard disk are full of movies now... afraid that it's going to explode if i dont buy the external fast...LOL :P

XOXO ♥

:: Collaborations of A & D::

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

I just remembered...
my friend D and I have decided to collaborate in a blog
it's just a ramble from both of us..
I dont know how will it turns out..but i hope it will be supercalifragalisticexpialidocious!! LOL

Design of the blog is totally by D..which is brilliant!!!
I just can't wait for her to apply it in the blog~~
Jia You D!!!

*big grin*


....empty....

~~hands are shaking cold~~

it's funny when I have all the connection to get on9...my mind just went blank everytime I'm trying to make an entry in here...
maybe it's the atmosphere around here...
I need a quite place for my muse to sprinkle me with her magic dust~



feels like my brain is running out of juice...
maybe bcoz of the hectic schedule i had this week..
oh well...hopefully i'll come up with a good idea to entertain you guys..LOL
Thank you for reading and keeping up with me :D

XOXO ♥

...Fantasy Couple...

been looking around for more drama and movie..
and i stumble upon this Korean Drama..
called





I found the download link in mediafire..
But sadly, it's hardsub in arabic


Fortunately, I've found the link to download the english softsub in Dramawiki
Better than nothing right? :D



haven't watched it yet...but some of my friends said that it's funny and also heartbreaking...
Oh well, I'll watch it later..after I finish downloading all the episodes.. *big grin*

hope you guys enjoy it~~


XOXO ♥

...books books books!!!!!! I must be insane...

Monday, December 7, 2009





I just went particularly frenzied by all the book fairs and book sales last week
and at the same time, I dont have any connection to the internet..how frustrating and excrutiating~~~ *sigh*

Oh well...the good news is, I have lots of books to keep me from fretting the whole time..LOL
went out with my best friend/childhood friend, Nur Sharmimi Bakar...we went to the book fairs by Times Book store at The Hills...and manage to take home with me 8 books with a very very low price...
Feels like I'm in heaven! LOL
I just bought my fav series since I'm in high school..Fearless by Francine Pascal
3 books for rm10



and another 3 english novel for rm20

and my favorite vampire series that I've been searching for quite a while here
2 The Vampire Beach Omnibus which cost me about rm50



Then we went to The Spring...coz we want to have some sushi time!!! *big grin*
 and I went to MPH while waiting for her to do something
and I found out that MPH was having a sales and lots of new books!!!!
I was speechless and feels like having a sugar rush!
Looking at all the lovely books...
I feel helpless...
If I didnt control myself, I believe that I would spend more than i should there...LOL
my favorite book series, Gifted have the newest series, New Moon with the movie cover, and a new series of Pemberley!!!
I found at the classical shelf...the story of Darcy and Lizzy after married, the Bennet sisters and the Darcy's daughters..
I'm being torn into parts!!!
I wish I could have it all!!!
But in the end, I end up with this book..which I just can't stop reading now..
Stoked!!! :D

It's a great book...Eventough it's not written by Jane Austen, but the author have done a great job on describing Pemberley and all the tenants and peoples that surrounds the lives of Darcy and Lizzy...
It's a great love story that continues beautifully after their marriage..
You can read the review here

How I wish that my marriage would be as passionate as those two and as happy and bliss...*melts*
not to mention the income of Pemberley.. *melts melts melts*


XOXO ♥


... a typical morning at work...

Friday, December 4, 2009

it's been fun at work...

filled with different characters that are as colorful as rainbow after the rain..
though the annoyance still linger for some
but at some point i do feel a lil sympathy for that person..as we always try to ignore him..
I hate when these feelings occured... *knock head*

but...lets get on with the others k..
no real name are put in here
there are
  • iris - blurry juz like 'sizuka', IS student... tp dpt ANC for her diploma...diam2 jak..LOL
  • riri - AD student...quite a character...very loud all the time except when we are having lunch..hahha
  • wawa - a shy guy..well, looks like it..IS student too...but he can be quite a chatter when it came to gossip..gossip boy!! ROTFL
  • fefe - another gossip boy.my junior CS..penyelak...suka kaco iris..hahhaa...coz iris owest slip her tongue when she pronounce S and R
  • rere - my CS classmate...she prefer to sit and play her farmville...but at times she also join fefe to selak people..hahhaha..and she likes to tease wawa...LOL
well...i prefer not to talk bout the other person...though i do feel kinda guilty for ignoring him these few days...
I feel kinda rude...I dont like being treated that way if i'm in his place..but I dont know how to deal with him..
I'm sorry...but I have to.. 

Oh well, not to spoil my mood this lovely morning...
all we care about is downloading movie or series..hahhaa
and of course our work too~~
that's all for the time being

XOXO ♥

...it's all bull-s**t...

Thursday, December 3, 2009

actually, this thought have been hanging around in my head lately
Just didn't have the right time and the right place to spill it out
Haven't been able to get my hands on Kaname-sama the lappy at night coz mum've been using it..
But now, she got her own little lappy, so she won't bother mine...i hope so..hahaha

The thing is...
People keep saying that size doesn't matter...or appearance doesn't matter..
But you what?
It's all bulls**t!
No matter what, people will always looks at the appearance rather than what's inside you...
It's a typical way of human thinking i might say...
The Impression always be the first thing people think about and talk about...
Looks always comes first..even for me...

I'm saying this out of what I've observe from certain people that I've known...
Since I'm little, grandma keep saying that I'm beautiful, but grandpa keep saying that I look like a monkey coz I was quite a rascal back then...play with the boys and act like them...hahahhaa..
And i was so active that everything that i ate just don't linger long enough to become fat in my body..
But since I entered senior high school and been busy with classes and club activities, I stop our daily race routine...
A sudden stop makes all the things that I ate became fat..LOL

I like it though....coz guys notices me more less than before I guess...
I used to think that being beautiful is harder than being ugly...
Coz I always think that people will only love me for how I look..
Not what I am inside...
So, when my grandpa keep saying that I look fat and no one will like me...I'm feeling quite content..hahahha

Then, my mum keep asking me to cut down my food intake...my dad still loves me regardless...
and there's this one person..she keep saying that I look just fine and not fat..bla bla bla...
and she said looks doesnt matter..and those stuff..bla bla bla...
Then suddenly, she compares me with my sister...which I hate a lot!
I hate comparison!
She told me that I should slim down..coz I'm more beautiful than my sister if I'm slimmer...
which I totally disagree!!
No matter what my sis is more beautiful...I adore her... :D
and to think that she compared me with my sis and told me to find a good guy and to slim down to look beautiful...it's just too much!!!
Seriously!
I dont care if no one likes me the way I am now...
Apparently, they are not worthy for me that way...
I still remember the feelings of insecure I get when I was in my previous r/ship...
I keep asking him why? the real reason he likes me...and I'm feeling more insecure when he answered bcoz I'm beautiful...
It's gruesome~~~
I feel as though he would leave me anytime when he feels I'm not beautiful enough for him anymore..
which kinda turns out true...b*****d
ooppsss!! getting so emo out of the blue...
oh well...
I think that's quite enough for now..
Klak ada gik org ngerepak mdh panjang glak n xda noktah lak...ROTFL

XOXO  ♥

♬♫♪ laugh it off the......whatever ♪♫♬


 I'm trying hard to play Gavotte these few days...
It's kinda hard..what with the slur and the crochet and so much more..
But I hope I could play it well by the next class...

I like the sounds... I try to memorize it but my fingers just won't keep up with me..
Keep slacking at the slur part~~
*sigh*

Btw, my sister bought 3 hamsters for us..
and i just started paying attention to them yesterday...
and they are soooo kawaiiii!!!!!! ♥♥♥

and my sister mock me by saying, "we already fell in love with them for a long time, but you just realize how cute they are?? Go la play your violin...always so busy with violin"
hahahhaa...
sorry sis, I just want to improve my skills..that's all~~
But lately, been going home late from work and fetching up mum n big sis..i sometimes didnt have the time to practice...
When i have the time, i usually end up playing for one hour straight..and then i fall asleep tired from playing~~~

well...at least having fun at work even though there one person that always makes me feel sooooo annoyed~
Oh well...enough said~
That's all for now

XOXO ♥

...life's like the sea...


pictures credits to google

All these while
I've been watching and loving the seaworld of adults
Watching how the sea become calm with the slight breeze
Watching how the wave of love come crashing the serenity of the ocean
Watching how the same wave can cause different kind of emotions




Watching from the cliff
All I wanted is to jump in the ocean
and feel all the different kind of emotions there is
To know what the wave of love really feels
To experience all the different kind of waves there is

I've waited for my time
I dive into the sea
I go along with the current
I'm having fun along the wave

Until that particular wave came
and I found myself unable to pull through
I keep sinking down to the bottom

Now I'm finally able to breathe
But nothing feels the same again
Coz my lungs still feel the burnt from the salty water
and it seems like nothing can get rid of it
naraj 09 ©

XOXO ♥



..remember december...

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

so, it's december....
In a blink of an eye...we reach the end of the year
and Christmas is coming up!

Lots of stuff to do lately..
haven't been able to post any stuff yet~

Briefly, I've been watching Koishite Akuma (Vampire Boy)


It's about a young vampire who still haven't grown his canine teeth.
Still downloading the ep3 now..I've watch till ep 2..
Quite captivating! ♥♥♥

The torrent link and direct link download can be found from

still waiting for Samurai High School Ep4 and Yumeiro Pattissiere Ep9 to be uploaded by timelessub and Strawberry-mint..

...Samurai High School...

Friday, November 27, 2009

ahhhh....listening to the sounds of the wave while writing this down in a balcony with the wind gently caressing me...
It feels sooo good~~~ LOL

I just want to share my favorite drama for the time being...
Samurai High School

which Miura Haruma is the lead actor!!! *melts*
It's about a very wacky high school teenager that is being possess by his ancestor, the Samurai with the same name as him. A very funny one i might say...keep laughing while watching it...and Miura is soooo cute!!!
It's still ongoing.. I can't wait for the next episodes..

and you can find the download link from
Love this site!!! Got lots of drama series for download

Hope you guys enjoy it too!!! (n_n)

XOXO ♥



....☼ shines....

Thursday, November 26, 2009

☁ Life is like going thru the Ferris wheel endlessly☁

Everyday, my lil bro will fetch me up when I'm going to or back from work..
Sometimes, he drives the car, sometimes he bring his scooter...

As we are on our way home..the sun shines so brightly in the evening that time
and i was hiding my face from it...My eyes hurts like hell from the glare of the sun..
So, i was looking down at the road most of the time..

And it just pop in my head...

I feel just like the Sun...
I think I noe how it feels...


 As everyone aware of, Sun plays an important role in our daily life..
We need it to dry up our laundry
We need the heat to feel hot
We need it to make sure our plants grow beautifully
 
We need the ray to light up our day
To keep it short, we need it to live our lives!

But, we never looks the sun in the eyes...
We never truly looks at it..
We hate it when the day became too hot for us...
We hate it when it shines to bright and hurt our eyes...
We hate it when everything get so dry and the rain doesn't fall...

Frankly speaking, we hate the sun and we never look it in the eyes or really understands it..
But when we want the ray and the heat, then we'll be wishing for it to show up...
But we never really love it anyway...


Just like what I've felt...mostly in my life....

Since I was a lil kid...
I was mostly not needed in my own house..
My mum keep telling me to sleep at grams house..which is ok with me, coz i love my gramps..
But I do feel a lil bit hurt..coz everytime I'm not home with them, they always bring my sister to go out...
Until when I was able to cook, and helping in the kitchen, which is thanks to my lovely grandma that loves to taught me everything that I'm curious about...
By then, my mum keep asking me to come home to help her cook...
When my sister watched tv, I'm in the kitchen cooking...and thankfully not alone, coz my precious dad always accompany me and also taught me new things to cook..
While grandma taught me Malay and kampung food, my dad taught me western and chinese food...
I love them both so much! Both mum and son!
May Allah blessed my father's soul~~ Amin..

Well...so to speak, I'm only needed at home when she needs someone to help take care of the house, of my siblings and also do all the chores that she never asked my sister to do...
When i complaint, she keeps telling me that I'm not grateful for what she have done for me...
I never rebel much back then..coz I just want her to accept me like she did with my sister...
But sadly...it was never that way...
She only will act mellow with me when there's something she wants me to do..
If not, it's only to scold me of something that is not my fault..
Just like the sun....being hate just when it was trying to do it's best for us...

But I'm ok with it now I guess..kind of used with it..and she did mellow a lil bit since Dad passed away...
Maybe she realize that she was always being unfair to me...
Maybe she realize that, Daddy is not here anymore to back-up for me, which he always do...
*Gosh, I miss him*

Maybe...she did love me after all...


XOXO ♥